“On the girl’s brown legs there were many small white scars. I was thinking, Do those scars cover the whole of you, like the stars and the moons on your dress? I thought that would be pretty too, and I ask you right here please to agree with me that a scar is never ugly. That is what the scar makers want us to think. But you and I, we must make an agreement to defy them. We must see all scars as beauty. Okay? This will be our secret. Because take it from me, a scar does not form on the dying. A scar means, I survived.” – Little Bee by Chris Cleaves
about two years ago I read this book and in the opening few pages there was this quote. the book is about a girl who is finally getting out of a camp for refugees. I think if I remember correctly.
I used to think my scars were ugly. and I was annoyed and angry that they just wouldn’t fade away because I would always have ugly arms and I would always hate them. but that’s not the case now. I’m not proud of what I went through to make these scars but I am proud that they are there now to show that I survived. that I fought and that I won and I won’t give in.
it has been nearly 800 days since I last cut myself open. my skin has came back together and my mind has become stronger. I know that I am worth so much more than a razor against my skin. I feel like when I was younger the things I hurt myself over were trivial and silly but to me inside my head they were massive.
in this day and age self harm is still such a massive problem. I had my boyfriends sister tell me that although she had never hurt herself there had been nights where she had sat with a knife to her wrist. this broke my heart and I cried for about and hour hugging her because I never want her to feel alone and to feel like she has to go through that.
the other day when I was talking to her she told me her friend had been hurting herself and that she helped her to go to the school who told her mum and helped her to get it sorted. I was really proud of this because I know she is such a strong girl and she’s gonna grow up to become such an amazing individual.
I know scars being defined as beautiful can be a bit controversial as it can be seen as romanticizing self harm. I’m not doing that at all because there is nothing romantic about shaking late at night with blood pouring out of you because you have no other way that works to make you feel better. however people you see with scars should not be seen as weird or different. they are just normal people who have have had their struggles.